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Like in Homestuck, there are several exiles that will talk to you as you play the game, serving as a tutorial. There are five exiles currently in the game, and which one a player gets does not majorly impact gameplay. All exiles have dialog for the different events and actions the players take up until they enter The Medium. These exiles have no official names and will be referred to by their text file names.

Antsy telling the player where the computer is

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Antsy[]

Antsy "TYPES IN ALL CAPS BEFORE ACCidently turning capslock off". From their dialog, it can be inferred they may be a consort, they have no idea what any of the machines in the Phernilia Registry are or do but understand their importance, and they have met the player before... Or will meet the player eventually. The font used by Antsy is called TYPOSTUCK, and this exile has some similarities to Wayward Vagabond.

Dialog:

>CHILD.

>CHILD CAN YOU HEAR ME.

>CHILD YOU MUST HELP ME AGAIN

>YOU MUST!!!!

Upon seeing Guardian:

>WHO IS THIS.

>CHILD YOU MUST EVICT THIS LARGE CHILD IMMEDIATLY.

>HIT HIM. DO IT CHILD

>DO IT! HIT HIM.

Upon beating Guardian in strife:

>GOOD JOB CHILD.

>GRAB THE CIRCLE IT LOOKS DELICIOUS

>DO IT!!!

>GRAB THE EDIBLE CIRCLE!!!!!!

Upon taking Sburb disc:

>CHILD PUT IT IN THE GLOWING SQUARE

>THE SQUARE WITH ALL THE BRIGHT COLORS

>THE ONE IN YOUR RELAXATION QUARTERS!!!!

>CHILD THE SQUARE!!!!

>THE GLOWING SQUARE!!!!!!!

Upon booting up Sburb:

>DO NOT SPEND THE BLUE CANDY. IT IS A WASTE OF NUTRIENTS

>PUT DOWN THE MACHINES!!!!

>PUT THEM DOWN NOW!!!

Upon having a server player deploy machines around you:

>WHO PUT THIS HERE

>WAS IT YOU CHILD

>WHO DID THIS

Upon opening the cruxtruder:

>WHAT HAVE YOU DONE

>STUPID STUPID STUPID CHILD

>YOU ARE GOING TO DIE

>WHAT IS THIS COLored candy

>wait

Upon grabbing cruxite:

>there is a book here

>child did you do this

>these pages say you need to put the "cruxite" in the "Totem Lathe"

>you must grab the card with holes on it and put it in the machine!!!

>do it now child!!!!

Upon prototyping:

>who is that

>ask them who they are

Upon carving dowel with pre-punched card:

>put it in the circle platform thing!!

>quickly child!!!

Upon entry:

>you did it child!!!!

>i must depart now

>be safe

>you will see me soon

Cheerful[]

Cheerful "types with no capitalization or punctuation other than exclamation marks and emoticons! :)" From their dialog, it can be inferred they are not human and they have an understanding, albeit limited, of what the machines in the Phernilia Registry do. While it isn't apparent if they have met the player before or not, they seem to know of the other players in a session. The font used by Cheerful is called Courier, and does not seem to share any similarities with any exile from Homestuck.

Dialog:

>hello child!

>please, you must listen to me!

>you could be hurt :(

Upon seeing Guardian:

>this large human has the circle!

>go, fight! you need to

>that circle is very important

Upon beating Guardian in strife:

>yay!!! :D you are a formidable warrior!

>now hurry, to the home device!

>put the circle in it and begin!!!

Upon taking Sburb disc:

>come on friend!!! :)

>youre almost there, just return to your sleep chamber!

>put the circle in the home device!!!!!

Upon booting up Sburb:

>be sensible with your gems, you dont have a lot

>your friend needs those machines! put them down please

>you dont have much time, hurry!!!

Upon having a server player deploy machines around you:

>oh, your friend seems to be helping you!

>you need to open the machine with a tube on top

>quickly! :O

Upon opening the cruxtruder:

>great work! :D

>that flashy orb is shaped like a friend

>now take some of the candy cylinders!!!

>theyll be important

Upon grabbing cruxite:

>now take the little card!

>you should put your candy in the long boxy machine

>theres a spot for the card thing too, try it!

Upon prototyping:

>a new friend!!!

>your orb turned into a friend!

>:D :D :D

Upon carving dowel with pre-punched card:

>a shapey friend!!!

>take your shapey friend to the biggest machine now

>you get to make another friend!!! :D

Upon entry:

>i have to go now

>good luck, friend!

>i know youll be alright on your own :)

Elegant[]

Elegant "Types in a grammarly correct and motherly manner". From their dialog it can be inferred they have an understanding of what the machines in the Phernilia Registry do. It seems they have met, or at least heard of the player, and they seem to know of the other players in a session. Elegant uses a font called Pacifico, and they seem to share similarities with the Windswept Questant.

Dialog:

>Child? Can you hear me, child?

>You are in great danger, child.

>You must listen to me, your world depends on it.

>Find the metallic circle. The one that fits nicely into the slot on the bright square.

Upon seeing Guardian:

>Who is that? Does he pose a threat to you?

>It seems like they are keeping you from the disc.

>You must take that disc, no matter the cost.

>Defeat them!

Upon beating Guardian in strife:

>Splendid job, child. I always knew you were capable of saving us.

>Let no one stand in your way.

>Take the disc, child.

Upon taking Sburb disc:

>Amazing. Now place it in the home machine. In your sleeping quarters.

>Be quick, child. Time is not on our side.

>Place it in the machine child, swiftly.

Upon booting up Sburb:

>Use the blue gems wisely. You only have a limited amount.

>Place down the machines. Your friend depends on you.

>Put down the machines, child. You must, for your friend's sake.

Upon having a server player deploy machines around you:

>Perfect. We can get to work, now that the machines have been placed.

>Child, you must interact with the cylindrical one.

Upon opening the cruxtruder:

>We don't have much time. Grab the dowels, now!

>Child, you must grab the cylinder inside the machine!

>Now is now the time to fool around! Your life is in danger!

Upon grabbing cruxite:

>Take it to the Totem Lathe!

>You need the pre-punched card! The one with all the holes on it!

>Put them both in the Totem Lathe!

Upon prototyping: (Elegant, unlike all other exiles, has no lines for when the Kernel Sprite is prototyped.)


Upon carving dowel with pre-punched card:

>Take it, and place it in the Alchemiter!

>The machine that is shaped like a wide circle!

>Quickly, child!

Upon entry:

>You did it. I'm so proud of you.

>I must take my leave now.

>I trust you will be more than fine on your own.

>Good luck.

Militant[]

Militant "Types in a VERY aggressive manner, soldier!" From their dialog it can be inferred they have an understanding, albeit limited, of what the machines in the Phernilia Registry do. While it isn't apparent if they have met the player before or not, they seem to know of the other players in a session. Militant uses a font called Impact, and they do not seem to share any similarities with any exile from Homestuck.

Dialog:

>ATTENTION SOLDIER!

>I expect you to be UP AND READY for your operation today!

>This is a mission, and I will NOT let it proceed UNSUPERVISED!

Upon seeing Guardian:

>The enemy is holding the disc hostage, soldier!

>Your first mission is to retrieve this disc, PRONTO!

>Do NOT disappoint me, soldier.

Upon beating Guardian in strife:

>Stop.

>Now SEIZE the disc.

Upon taking Sburb disc:

>Mission accomplished, soldier.

>Now BACK to the locals.

Upon booting up Sburb:

>We have LIMITED resources soldier, use them wisely.

Upon having a server player deploy machines around you

>It appears that our ALLY has delivered machines to you.

>Now, STORM the cylindrical one !

Upon opening the cruxtruder:

>The flashing orb is NOT an enemy soldier.

>RETRIEVE the COLORFUL HOSTAGE from the top of the device.

Upon grabbing cruxite:

>Now, take the HOSTAGE to the elongated device.

>A pre-punched card is NEEDED, soldier.

Upon prototyping:

>Looks like a new soldier joined the RANKS.

Upon carving dowel with pre-punched card

>Now, you will need to ESCORT the newly shaped hostage to the platform.

>Move! Move! Move!

Upon entry:

>Good work out there soldier.

>My mission here is completed.

Serious[]

Serious "Types in a very serious and urgent manner." From their dialog, it can be inferred that they have an understanding of what the machines in the Phernilia Registry are and do. While it isn't apparent if they have met the player before or not, they seem to know of the other players in a session. The font used by Serious is called Calibri, and they do not seem to share any similarities with any exile from Homestuck.

Dialog:

>Greetings, child.

>Please follow these instructions with utmost attention.

>Your life, and the lives of many others, depends on it.

Upon seeing Guardian:

>I believe this is your "Guardian".

>Your "Guardian" should be holding a disc, which you ought to obtain.

>You might have to engage in a "Strife" to perform said action.

Upon beating Guardian in strife:

>Congratulations.

>You should be able to retrieve the disc safely.

>Please pick up the disc from the floor.

Upon taking Sburb disc:

>You now have the SBURB disc.

>To use it properly, you will need a personal computer.

>I believe you have one in your room.

Upon booting up Sburb:

>Using the SBURB program costs minerals. Please be careful.

>Use the tools at your disposal to deploy all the machines for your friend.

>This triggers a countdown, but remain calm.

Upon having a server player deploy machines around you:

>Your server player has deployed machines necessary to your entry.

>Please move towards the machine showing a cylinder on top.

>You should be able to open the cylinder.

Upon opening the cruxtruder:

>Good. Now, take the colored cylinder with you.

>The flashing orb may react with nearby objects, but do not worry.

>It serves to benefit you.

Upon grabbing cruxite:

>Use this cylinder on the horizontal rotating device.

>You will also need a "Pre-punched Card".

>Use them both on the "Totem Lathe".

Upon prototyping:

>It appears that the "Kernelsprite" is "prototyped".

Upon carving dowel with pre-punched card:

>Once your cylinder is carved, take it to the platform-shaped device.

>There should be a compartiment for your shaped cylinder.

>The entry process is nearly complete.

Upon entry:

>Congratulations, you successfully entered the game.

>As my role is now fulfilled, I shall leave you to your session.

>Best of luck.

Custom Exiles[]

It is possible to make your own exile dialog files! Below, you will find two links; one to a documentation sheet, perfect for those unfamiliar with how the files work, and a blank sheet, good for those who know what they're doing. Simply download the file of your choosing and open it with notepad!

This is the file with documentation!

This is the blank sheet!

Trivia[]

  • Antsy has the most lines of dialog, clocking in at 41 lines.
  • Militant has the least lines, having only 21.
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